You Want Me To See a Psychologist? Why should I?
“You want me to do what?” Tessa asked as she turned to her husband, a look of shock and anger on her face. “I want you to see a therapist with me”, Brent replied quietly. “I think it will help; I mean, we keep having the same fights, and I am getting sick of this.”…
From Conflict to Connection. A New 9-step Program by Dr. Tony Fiore
They say that doctors make the worst patients. I sometimes wonder if this is true for psychologists who seek counseling. In my profession, the majority of my day is spent listening. In fact, I have spent much of the past 40 years listening to my patients, being there for their highs and lows, guiding them…
Is Politics Affecting Your Relationship?
Throughout my life, I have seen political opponents come and go, listened to people speak of their differing opinions, and watched the events surrounding Washington play out without directly impacting my practice. However, our political climate has been so emotionally charged over recent years that the divide between sides has never been more significant. In…
Align Your Expectations and Decrease Conflict
Expectation. This single word can cause so much conflict in a relationship. At some point, we all have expectations in a partnership, such as how the other person will behave, think, or feel, and these expectations stem from our own world experiences and personal values. When our expectations are not met, we can feel irritated,…
Part Two: Retreat and Think Things Over.
Take the High Road. In my previous post, we learned what happens to our bodies in times of stress, how our brain releases stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline, and how this quickly begins to course through our bodies, increasing our heart rate and blood pressure. In this post, I explain how to take…
Retreat and Take Time to Think Things Over.
How to Let Calmer Heads Prevail. Part one. Cassie and Phil loved each other dearly but often found themselves in heated verbal battles over almost anything and everything. The most minor disagreements quickly became a full-fledged war over who was right and who was wrong. This left Cassie and Phil feeling exhausted, emotionally disconnected from…
Should You Forgive? The Power of Letting Go.
Long-term relationships come with a myriad of challenges. From learning to accept quirks that grate your nerves to reconciling after a full-blown argument. Every relationship has highs and lows; it helps us grow together and understand and respect each other’s boundaries. We discover what we are willing to change within reason and what is a…
Anger and your relationship: The road to repair $69.95
I am pleased to announce the release of my new online couples course called “Anger and your relationship: The road to repair”. This new course has been designed from the ground-up to be taken as a solo course (meaning you don’t have to take it with your partner) or as a course that couples can…
The Significance of Social Awareness
Social awareness plays a crucial role in our interactions with others, yet some people seem completely unaware of the impact they have on those around them. They may unintentionally upset people in various settings, like at work or within their family, yet remain puzzled when confronted with negative reactions. Their lack of empathy prevents them…
What role does conflict play in your relationship? FREE Mini-Course
This FREE mini course is the introduction to my popular series: “Anger and your relationship: The road to repair”. In this course, I offer 3 lessons that help you understand how and why conflict may be playing a role in your relationship. Upon completing the course, you will receive a special offer for future courses. This course…
Why couples fight: A Psychologist’s guide to understanding relationship conflict $14.95
This innovative mini course provides you with an insight into the dynamics of your relationship. We show you how to recognize dysfunctional patterns, give insight into why you fight and explore the neurobiological responses of the brain in stressful situations. We then provide you with a set of techniques to follow to effectively and harmoniously…
Discover harmony in your relationship: A Psychologist’s guide to conflict resolution $19.95
This mini course introduces you to the concept and principals of Verbal Aikido and its application in marital communication. Verbal Aikido empowers you to resolve marital conflict in a harmonious manner that fosters unity in your relationship. We then explore the importance of emotional connection and how modern day technology has entirely changed our communication…
Rise above the chaos and embrace your inner smile $19.95
In addressing partner conflict, the first step is not to focus on your partner but on yourself. In this mini course, we emphasize the importance of centering your mind and body, creating a state of mental and physical calm. We teach you the value of being mindful of your emotions and the importance of acting…
Understanding your partner: Unveiling the secrets to a deeper connection $24.95
In this mini course, we teach you to the art of Irimi. Here you learn to focus on your partner while centering yourself using your ‘wise adult’ frame of mind. Irimi involves using cognitive empathy to understand your partner’s perspective from a loving and harmonious place. There are six techniques that we cover that are designed to…
Harmony unleashed: The power of focused relationships $19.95
In this mini course, we equip you with the knowledge to not only focus on yourself but also your partner, fostering a team-oriented mindset of ‘we’ and ‘us’ as opposed to seeing each other as adversaries. You learn the techniques grounded in the Aiki principles, gaining the ability to let go of old habits, overcome…
Dealing with perpetual issues
Relationship research has revealed that a high percentage of relationship issues are unsolvable. These are often called “Perpetual Issues”. Every relationship has these unresolvable issues – but the key difference between successful couples is how they handle these issues. Learn a basic principle in how successful couples manage to deal with perpetual issues and how…
Married to a narcissist? 3 steps for survival.
Learn 3 crucial steps to be able to live with a narcissist. If you are in a relationship with a narcissist and feel that it is worthwhile staying in the relationship, I provide 5 additional tips on how you can work around the type of narcissist you may be involved with. Not all narcissists are…
How to Get the Most out of Marriage Counseling
A guide for Orange County couples on the brink of divorce Many couples come to me after they’ve tried traditional marriage counseling. They’re usually frustrated and depressed. One of the most common things they say is: “We tried marriage counseling and it didn’t work!” If you feel this way, you’re not alone. But, as you’ll see,…
What to do if one spouse doesn’t want to have sex
When a Spouse Doesn’t Want to Have Sex It has been two months since Janet and Mark have had sex. They’re hardly speaking to each other. If you asked Janet about this, she would say that their home has become a battle zone-they fight about every little thing. Janet goes out of her way to…
Can I Fall Back in Love After The Thrill is Gone?
Having been a therapist for over thirty years, I am always pleased to find new ways of helping couples. A few years ago, I discovered a treatment approach by Willard Harley that’s short term and practical. Combined with other techniques that I use, this approach has proven effective. Furthermore, it offers hope to relationships that…
Anger and couple finances: How to avoid financial infidelity
The most valuable thing in a long-term stable relationship is having a partnership, and most new couples don’t realize that money is a major factor in marital happiness. Money is one of the biggest generators of problems, arguments, and resentment in long-term relationships. Couples argue about spending, saving budgeting, and disparity in earnings. When couples…