Angry Over Power Struggles in Your Relationship?
A young angry misguided soul sat in one of our anger management classes dejected. The instructor asked why he was there. He said that his wife was angry over his not putting the toilet seat down after his use. Other class members looked at him incredulously and remarked: “you spent all this money on an…
Anger Management In Action: Try Simple Habit Changes
Thirty one year old Harry is a fairly typical client in our local anger management classes. At work he is considered a very nice man, a lamb, really. By his co=workers, he would be voted last place on a list of people who needed anger management. But his wife Holly tells a different story. She…
Resentment Blocks Love and Closeness
Resentment: “Bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly” I learned about resentment when I was sixteen years old and basically had two things on my mind. The second thing was getting a car. I saw myself as a responsible boy who earned good grades, was no trouble to anybody and basically had a clean record….
Anger Management As a Business- A Personal Journey
People often ask how I got into anger management. Actually, the truth is that ten years ago I was looking for a supplemental mental health business to my clinical practice that was cash-based, so I wouldn’t have to rely on unstable insurance payments for my livelihood, I found it necessary to acquire private health insurance….
Anger Management Classes: How We Teach Empathy
Through he years, I have asked our anger management class participants what they expected class to be like before they actually came. Thought I’d share some of the responses I have received: “Anger Management Class is like traffic school.” “Like a support group therapy for angry people.” “Full of convicts and criminals.” “In anger management…
Anger Management in Action: How Can I Be More Patient?
Meet 25 year old Julia who came to our local anger management class for help with the question “How can I be more patient?” Seems that Julia was constantly irritated with other people.She tried not to be, but her impatience and irritability constantly leaked out with her body language, her attitude, and her sarcasm. She…
Anger Management in Action: Forgiving an Affair
Affair recovery is a complex process for both partners. Rage and anger after discovery of an affair is normal; successful affair recovery requires mastery of basic tools of anger management, including the tool of forgiveness.
Anger Management and sex: When a cigar is just a cigar……..
I first met Jim on a Friday morning in my office with his wife Sally. They consulted me for mostly because Jim seemed always irritated with Sally. No matter what she did, he was mad. He had no patience with her. She was ready to call it quits because she said she was tired of…
Was Jesus Ever Angry?
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all readers. I write this from lovely Sante Fe, New Mexico while looking our at the majestic mountains and thinking about life and the role of anger in our lives. Then, I came across this article. while surfing the net. Although we do not teach anger management from…
Angry Mothers: Learn Mindfulness. Then Teach It To Your Children!
The Problem “I can’t deal with my own children,” lamented a young mother in one of our anger management classes.“They won’t listen, they do exactly what they want, they constantly fight with each other, and they won’t do their chores without a major argument.” This young mother was ashamed that she was constantly angry at…
Anger Management in Action: Increase Your Emotional Intelligence
Anger Management requires eight core skills, one of which is emotional intelligence. Those with high emotional intelligence have empathy for their partner, are sensitive to how their behavior is affecting their partner and practices different responses to their partner’s upset to increase understanding and emotional connection.
Do You Display Defensive Anger? Three New Strategies to Deal with Verbal Attacks!
Doc, the new client said, I am not an angry guy. I only get angry when people piss me off. The rest of the time I am fine This humorous interchange occurs often in our anger management classes. We gently explain that, of course, it is much easier to stay calm and rational when nobody…
Mindfulness and Anger Management
Mindfulness and Anger Management- Guest Article We all have moments when things slow down and we are suddenly very present for life. We often have this ‘tuned in’ experience when we are in nature, or it it may happen when we are highly focused on some activity, or sometimes it occurs when we are simply…
A Master Passive Aggressive
Some times you have to give the devil his due! Such is the case with my brother Tom, an intelligent but very manipulative young man as we were growing up in Ohio. He and my Italian-American father were constantly conflicting with each other because Tom was..well, very stubborn and my father simply didn’t have the…
Do some angry people not show it?
We all recognize the hot-headed person who yells, shouts, has a red face, clenched fists and bulging neck veins when angered or frustrated. It is easy to see that person as angry. But, is it possible to be just as angry but never show it? To suppress angry feelings or turn  them inward so that the anger affects our…
Can a Relationship Survive Anger?
Contrary to popular opinion (even among professionals), anger isn’t necessarily bad or destructive to a relationship. All couples have conflicts and frustrations. It is not the anger itself that separates successful couples from other couples. Rather, what separates them is how anger is handled and how the partners communicate with each other while angry over the issues…
Accepting Others With Limitations is a Challenge For Some
“I worked hard for my knowledge,” Bob said in a session, but “others want to drain me of my knowledge and skill so they won’t have to do the hard work themselves to learn it.” “Besides, they are so stupid and they are unmotivated to improve themselves.” Bob was very much into self-development and self-improvement and thought…
Do Anger Professionals Get Angry?
This is a common question that my clients either ask me, or want to ask me as they sit either in anger management class or in private consultation. The short answer is that yes, of course, anger management professionals get angry, like everyone else. But, hopefully the anger management professional uses his own teachings to manage his…
Who Attends Our Anger Management Classes?
What is your vision of who comes to anger management classes or takes anger management courses online? People often wrongly envision that our classes are filled with people who physically abuse their spouses, are court ordered, and are generally the type of people you wouldn’t necessarily invite into your home. That got me to thinking…
Control Your Anger – Self-Talk in Action
In our Anger Management Local Classes, as well as in our online programs, we teach participants the value of changing your “self-talk” in order to dial down those angry feelings triggered by any number of events in our world. The following story about a grandfather and his  spoiled out-of-control 3 year-old grandson illustrates this beautifully – and…
AngerCoach Show – Episode #15 – Peace at any price?
This month we discuss the whether the concept of “Peace at any price” is really valid when dealing with issues that come up in marriage. When dealing with problems in any relationship, assertive communication will often yield better results because it communicates feelings better than simply “clamming up”.